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My Heart is Strong and it is Misshapen

My heart is strong and it is misshapen. It greets me every time I enter my work space and it reminds me of its presence all throughout my day. My college friend Julia made it for me out of leftover fabric and lace from her wedding dress making business and buttons which were left to her from other folks who sew and who have passed.


Today as I look at my heart it is bulging full of prayer requests which just stick right out of its pocket and make the shape crooked and misaligned.

My heart has been full so much of the time as of late, and it takes nearly an hour to go over all the slips that are held within and reviewed each day. I put moments of grace and gratitude in often but the concerns and issues grossly outnumber.

There are prayer request for Economic Justice Issues

  • Please may no child go to bed hungry?
  • Please may executives of companies not be so greedy with their salaries and be equitable to their workers. Change the CEO –Worker ratios.
  • May our country recover from its trade imbalance
  • May large companies not demand all the clean water
  • May people not lose their retirement funds and may they have meaningful work

There are prayer requests for Conflict Resolution

  • No guns or weapons
  • Siblings learn to conflict with words and skills not hitting and fighting
  • Husbands and wives truly understand each other and work issues through
  • No more wars

There are prayer requests of health

  • A magic pill to lose weight that worked
  • A cure for cancer and diabetes – list all the diseases here
  • Pain relief and suffering cured
  • And health for so many babies and children

There are prayer requests for Individuals

  • The President Elect of the USA
  • The Governor and law makers of States
  • For Military Personnel and solders on the front lines
  • For mediators and Peace Makers
  • For friends with problems to solve
  • For folks to find success and vision
  • For babies born within tragedy and/or illness

I have a list of all the 9/11 victims, including the terrorists, and all the names of those who have died in Iraq, including British Troop, Canadian Troops and Iraqi citizens and children that I have been able to collect . Their families are included in our thoughts and voices.

My heart is crammed full to the overflow with prayers.

To take a picture of my heart I will need to take some of the big requests out so you will understand, but I want you to know that my heart is full, it is misshapen and it is reaching capacity.

There is no room for doubt when I am venturing into my heart’s pocket. I must be confident and not of faint heart. I cannot afford to miss a beat. I must not think that my prayers will not be answered; for I know that the answers are not always what I wish to hear or feel.

And yet one issue is vibrant within me as I pray, it is so ALIVE it dominates my day. I pray without ceasing for a better outcome. Why in 2009 are we still at war – constantly on this planet of ours?

I believe it is ignorance. Why do you think we are constantly at war?
I am not talking about disagreements, conflicts and clarification – I am talking about machine guns, road side explosives, bombs, death and destruction. And how can we end this practice?

All of life involves destruction from weed to flower – It seems to me that nothing truly is ever gained by war and bloody conflict except more of the same.

What do you think? How can we end the practice of War? What is a true definition of Peace?

12 Responses to “My Heart is Strong and it is Misshapen”

  1. Davina Says:

    Hi Patricia. A very good question. I think you’ve hit the nail on the head, so to speak — ignorance. If we could just learn to understand each other without judgment, we would find peace.

    Instead of war, practice, or at least be aware of learning to understand. Knowing there is more going on behind what we see. For example, anger is really happening because a person feels small, or not respected and they just want to be seen and heard. So if we could not be afraid of the anger and “see” the person behind it, maybe we could move past it without “war”.

    Davinas last blog post..Blog + Comment = Win

  2. Dot Says:

    As long as people turn to hitting each other in disputes, we’ll have war. As long as people learn and believe that there is only one acceptable way to believe, we’ll have war. As long as we’re unable to empathize with others, see them as foreign, or see them as non-human, we’ll have war.

    Dots last blog post..New Year’s Resolutions

  3. patricia Says:

    Thank you for your comments – we keep practicing war and not peace. We need to learn how to conflict in new ways

    We need to teach new ways…I also wonder too if there is something like Rats in a Maze problems on top of unresolved ancient conflicts? It just does not make sense to me in this day and age.

  4. Vered - MomGrind Says:

    I hate to say this, but I don’t think we can end the practice of war. At least not as long as males rule the world.

  5. Jannie Says:

    Unfortunately I do not believe we will ever see an end to wars on Earth until after the Second Coming and Revelation.

    Maria Montessori said and to paraphrase, “the child’s future is formed by the time he or she is three. War is passed on from parent to child.”

    How can peaceful peoples possibly hope to change the minds and actions of people who have always warred and will always be warring? I don’t believe it can ever happen. For some war is not only all they have ever known or will ever know but is glorified as being a noble way of life. The end of war must start at home but unfortunately some homes are where wars begin.

    But, on a more positive note, a peaceful, giving and centred way of living out all our days, as you demonstrate, is a choice we can all make, and radiate to others. How can we not be happy and peacful in this bountiful place we are free to live in?.

    Your heart – maybe misshapen, but sure in the right place.

    Jannies last blog post..Job Ap Essay

  6. meggin Says:

    I think if we try to work together with people like Ghandi, Dali Lama, Barack Obama, Pope Benedict, Mother Teresa, John Lennon, Oprah Winfrey, Patricia Hamilton, we will get the job done so that Peace is out of the *please pray for* part of your heart and put into the *thank God for* part. Whoohoo..just maybe in our lifetime, but surely in our children’s if we work real hard at it!

  7. Robin Says:

    That’s a beautiful heart you have there, Patricia.

    I watched the movie The Secret for the first time last night, and it brought up the question of war and anti-war protests. The movie had already made the point that what we focus on expands, so if we say we don’t want “this” or “that”, we will only get more of those things.

    Applied to stopping wars, using this way of approaching things would mean to focus on the peace that is in the world, and in our own lives. Or we can focus on the intelligence in the world, rather than the ignorance. I personally don’t see this as fanciful thinking – I think this is how we can make real change.

    Robins last blog post..5-Year Plan For This Blog

  8. Patricia Says:

    I am thinking that we can achieve peace, no matter who is in charge, but this lastest round just made me so sad.

    I think we definitely need more parent education and we must get teenagers to stop dropping out of school. With 30 per 1000 drop out rate our teens miss out on most of the problem solving skills and integrated thinking skills classes that they need to learn to think wider, broader, and deeper. In the last 12 years these skills have been degraded as teachers and community leaders have to spend more time parenting and not teaching how to. One needs to be in college to get the opportunity to learn problem-solving skills and integrated thinking and we are learning more and better ways to teach these skills so parents need to upgrade their skills also.

    You put me in a very big league what a compliment Thank you.
    Thank God for you and your positive energy!

    I end each session of prayer with visualizing a world at peace. Each day I picture it with more clarity. Often times I see the women in black who stand for an hour on the street corner for peace so that their children lives will have meaning rather than being a statistic. For years now they have graced us every Friday evening first about 20 women now a crowd. I love knowing that all around the world (i.e. New Years Eve) millions of people do Sufi peace dancing – what energy.
    I just think we can achieve peace. I believe all things are possible…I am discouraged by this new go round and needed to mourn that event.
    Then yesterday I spent many hours visualizing the IV nurse having her heart see Palestine citizens as real people after she said to me that Israel was chosen by God so that all Palestinians should be wiped off the earth….the heart was sad – the prayer was for Peace for this nurse. Step by Step…

  9. Patricia - Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker Says:

    Patricia, you have a beautiful heart inside and out. Your inner beauty shines through in your words and prayers. As long as people send out love and prayers, this world has a chance of finding peace.

    Patricia – Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworkers last blog post..Kindness—Why Is It Easier To Be Kind To Strangers?

  10. patricia Says:

    Welcome to this blog community and I am so glad you made a comment.
    Yes, I firmly believe if we can continue to education folks and pray in the positive that we could end the practice of war. It is good to keep the focus going in where we wish to be and not dwell on what we do not want or what is happening right now…though it makes our hearts sad.

  11. Ruth Says:

    I think your heart is lovely. I’m also interested in how the prayer requests get in there. Do people leave them for you in the heart, or do you get them another way?

    I have no answers for what would bring peace. The situation in Gaza has been weighing heavily on my heart, especially since I have a friend who’s working in the West Bank. It hits me how these could as easily be the people she’s told me stories about or be her. I worry that violence will spread to her area. I wonder how people can think that killing civilians and destroying homes can lead to anything more than MORE hate and fighting. How much easier is it for people to become suicide bombers if most of their family is dead and their home is gone?

    I think that for war to stop, people will have to understand that war may stop particular evil events (holocaust) but peace isn’t as easily achieved. The pummeling Germany received in WWI only made it more open to Hitler’s leadership.

    Ruths last blog post..If You Can’t Be Compassionate To Yourself…

  12. patricia Says:

    The prayer requests come from my hospital visitations, my healing prayer group, people I meet on the street, conversations, the news and blogs. Sometimes I put the pieces of paper in the pocket of my heart and often people drop by and drop in a piece of paper as they leave….

    Yes, I think bombing only leads to people being more open to hatred….Hamas was voted in because they provided schools, food, and health care in various communities not bombs…people needed the basics…that is always how the terrorist gains control