Telling of my Cancer
On Deliberately Receiving I recently read this post by Melody. I thought it was one of the best statements about how we do or do not draw illness to ourselves – it was so invigorating to me and affirming of my health journey, I wrote an entire blog post in the comments section.
I would invite you to read Melody’s post, she shares very clearly.
Then I copied my comment and placed it here for you to read – it is a re- telling of my story and I learned a great deal from writing it and reading the post and Melody’s reply.
I was born with a large exterior cancerous tumor connected to my chest. I had to be delivered C-Section because of the tumor, but the only local hospital would not do C-Sections because they were Catholic and that would interfere with the birth process. My mother’s OBGYN took her to his offices and performed the C-Section and then another Pediatrician removed my tumor. Risking their careers. My Mother was moved to the hospital for 7 days of surgery recovery and I was taken home with the OBGYN for 7 days of care by his wife.
My body keeps manifesting these cysts which are full of toxins from the environment – including laundry soap residuals – which when they become too painful to endure any longer – Drs find them to be pre-cancerous and I have another surgery. My ovaries were covered with cancerous cysts when I had my Hysterectomy, the cysts were full of environmental toxins) ….which gave me 15 years of the most horrendous menopause symptoms one cannot even imagine. It was Kind of a gift…as I had to pull out of the work force to care for myself, my special needs child and finally my dying mother. I was determined to heal myself and live.
What I found was if I stayed home in my organic, healthy, air filtered environment – I did not have headaches and I did not grow more of these cysts. I do not eat cheese because of what my body tells me is in it and how much resistance it has to this stuff. I do not eat other people’s cooking (usually) I have learned how to hear the most minor transmissions from my body you can imagine.
But now I want to go outside and be with people more…not just read my life away…so I started by blogging to get some conversation going. On Biking Architect, I often write about how people make it hard for the environment and me to stay healthy. I put tea tree oil and bees wax in my nose and breathe through my nose so that I can go walking every day. I am working on going to choir practice once a week and singing about Peace.. I go to 2 book groups a month to be with people (and I eat their food – carefully) I only purchase food from my CSA and organic groceries. I am changing my vibrations so that I can go to San Francisco for Thanksgiving and not come home with massively swollen legs and joints and not have to stay in my daughter’s apt. all the time – while my family goes running and hiking and exploring. I am working on manifesting enough money to pay for this adventure; I would so like to be able to purchase some new clothing.
I think my weight is due to my body protecting me from the toxins in the environment.
And I still feel best about myself and happy and healthy when I stay home in my energy efficient healthy environment.
I am working on manifesting more friends to my blogs – Patricias Wisdom and Facebook and twitter….and I am working hard at figuring out technical stuff so that Wise Ears will use my talents towards making money…
I feel most powerful in my own healthy space and most relaxed and positive…but wow! can it be a private joy that I would like to share more.
Now I think this is a fabulous post – and Melody truly one of your best – and I hope it will stop people acting like my cancer and illnesses – and fat – are catching and a sign of my stupidity and dumbness – I am powerful beyond their imaginations and made even more powerful by learning and learning all this good stuff found here… …all the name-calling by the “others” just wears me down. Being denied health insurance hurts my feelings and wears me down baby steps, baby steps…. good words found here/Thank you.
Thank you Melody
Melody’s reply was just right.
So here is my post for today – it is revealing, but it is just exactly what I wanted to say.
I think my reading and commenting on posts is one of my most important aspects of my daily living.
Do you ever write whole posts in the comments section? Have you ever just copied and pasted your comment to make a post on your blog?
I need more comments on my blog posts and would invite you to share your ideas with me.
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I invite you to read this post too: I do not know anything different