Hilary,
If I am working on letting go of what is holding me back and keeping me from completing the change I need to accomplish to heal I will not heal. I wanted to be real about the rough moments of change, because these are the moments when folks quit and give up…because it is too hard. I am enjoying all the virtual hugs and support…. and I am having beans for lunch – if I don’t spill them in route to my mouth !!!
Thank you for your good words.

It’s so difficult to hold things in to yourself .. and rationalise what’s going on, realising that so much isn’t of your making, but leaving that negative behind is so tricky. I rationalise and then ‘turn on my heel’ and get on with life .. not at all easy – I know. I do hope Spring will lighten the load a little .. and Im so pleased you’re here and able to spill the beans with us .. my thoughts and hugs are with you ..
.-= Hilary´s last blog ..Women – how much education have women had in the past 2,000 years? =-.

Vered,
I am so glad you did like the post I think for me resisting is too hard…for me letting it out and naming it is better …brings it to the light of day.

I am clearing and cleaning out a great many things these days and truly it feels great. I think women have a need to be more open and clear – not give so much away

I sometimes get cranky, especially when I’m too busy, but I always fight it which takes tons of energy… you just gave me something to think about!

Davina,
I just gave up another project which was still riding in the caboose.
I feel a bit close to exploding out of myself…actually, but then I fell down on both knees walking this morning – duct tape was helpful, but now they are so swollen, I decided I needed to hold back again for a wee bit – at least until the next DR. appt.
on St. Patty’s day.
Yes, I think I am on the way, writing about healing…

Wow I have the greatest commenters of all…and such warm and cozy virtual hugs – I am so lucky
.-= Patricia´s last blog ..Embracing This Change =-.

OMG, as I was reading this it reminded me so much of “The Shift”. If you have a chance, watch the movie. What you said about being at the door of change is exactly what “the shift” is.

I’m so happy Lori of Think Like A Black Belt wrote about this movie as it is powerful and can change lives. It’s a must see. I’ve already watched it twice and love it. You’ll be able to identify with the “mom” in the movie. Her story made me cry.

((((hugs)))) to you, my friend.
.-= Barbara Swafford´s last blog ..My New Baby – The Unveiling – Enter The Drawing And Win =-.

Tony,
I am sending a hug too your way, that song was lovely and did lift my spirits also – you are thoughtful to share such a gift.
Those of us who make lots of changes in our lives recognize that what I am writing about it the “neutral zone” stage of a change…testing and wondering when one will fall through to the other side. This specific change for me was a surprise because I thought I was already working the other side…but I think now I was caught by the economic crisis and was suspended in midair change….my body is making me do it over

I did a book review on this blog of William Bridges Book TRANSITIONS – I read it often as it truly nourishes change artists. It comforts too.

Dot,
My partner does not like change and this economic crisis has really made big changes for him. We do sit and talk – as often as we are able, but he has had to let 5 employees go this year, and we have used all our short term savings and now retirement savings to keep everyone going – some work is starting to come in – uber slowly. The pressures on him are huge. He needs nurturing too and finds it by long bike rides. There are no funds to go out and eat – so someone has to cook. We have nothing to give each other at times….
I surely can feel that hug – Thank you.

Talon,
Thank you for your kind words. I can honestly say that I am getting some amazing help right now for this transition and for healing. All the commenters here just lift my spirits tremendously and encourage me to keep going. I’ll throw out another thank you to Davina too for her symbolic modeling experience – it is just expanding my thinking by leaps and bound – I hope everyone gets an opportunity to participate in that.

The adult educator in my thought I saw a teaching moment/ opportunity to share that the neutral zone when making a change is not just saying blithely “Well there were some tough times too – not so easy moments” I think people need to know there are rough spots and tough spots and lonely spots – because one is doing a new thing. A reality show reveal maybe?
I am making a huge transition and it involves being healthy after a life time of the body being unwell. I am doing a new thing – and it is scaring people around me – folks do many things to hinder a change they do not want to encourage. (Because it might make them have to change too?)

Betsy,
Yep it think you are right on – there is something huge ahead for me and my mind is ready my body is saying do this part over again please. Maybe this fallowing period will allow others to catch up and let go of their fear? Yes, I think I am having so many insights nearly everyday – I do think that the breakthrough is very near