Comments on: Relationships and the Role of Boundaries http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/ Helping individuals create positive life change. Wed, 08 Feb 2012 05:33:24 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 By: Patricia http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4425 Patricia Sat, 09 May 2009 00:24:36 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4425 Dot, Wow what good thoughts and ideas - thank you for your thoughtful comments. I do participate in counseling on line with women in the military (Afghanistan and Iraq) most who have been raped during their service time in the war zones. I have a number of PTSD folks also...and several Parents of Special Needs kids...I have to maintain my counseling license and not have them into my blog writing....how to do that...since my clients come to me via word of mouth via my blog....I don't really want to write another blog. Isn't it awful when a therapist violates the ethical boundaries. I am so sorry you experienced that....I am afraid I see it too often with children...I repeat how it saddens me when someone is abused in this way. Supervision is required in my state also....I have several friends now but being out of circulation for awhile has made it hard to find new acquaintances and connections. I am similar to many folks...I now get to try on this hat! Dot,
Wow what good thoughts and ideas – thank you for your thoughtful comments. I do participate in counseling on line with women in the military (Afghanistan and Iraq) most who have been raped during their service time in the war zones. I have a number of PTSD folks also…and several Parents of Special Needs kids…I have to maintain my counseling license and not have them into my blog writing….how to do that…since my clients come to me via word of mouth via my blog….I don’t really want to write another blog.

Isn’t it awful when a therapist violates the ethical boundaries. I am so sorry you experienced that….I am afraid I see it too often with children…I repeat how it saddens me when someone is abused in this way.

Supervision is required in my state also….I have several friends now but being out of circulation for awhile has made it hard to find new acquaintances and connections. I am similar to many folks…I now get to try on this hat!

]]> By: Patricia http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4424 Patricia Sat, 09 May 2009 00:17:45 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4424 Barbara, I was hoping the marriage writing contests would give me some guest posting folks, but not yet. thank you for you kind words about my blog and it was very fun to get together with the retired folks in my district and enjoy their travel pictures and adventures. I do like the blog as it is....I don't want to make much change but some more support in person would be good for me also I think? Barbara,
I was hoping the marriage writing contests would give me some guest posting folks, but not yet. thank you for you kind words about my blog and it was very fun to get together with the retired folks in my district and enjoy their travel pictures and adventures.

I do like the blog as it is….I don’t want to make much change but some more support in person would be good for me also I think?

]]> By: Dot http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4406 Dot Fri, 08 May 2009 15:35:17 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4406 I'm not one to give advice on making friends. I'm too much of a loner and, with my disabilities, it's hard to get out and meet people. My therapist teaches ethics for psychotherapists, so I've heard a great deal about why they're so important. However, since she's involved with other therapists in teaching at a major university, as well as serving on committees in the APA and being elected to numerous offices, she's not lonely. Objective supervision is essential and required, at least for psychotherapists in my state. Having had a therapist who violated quite a few of the boundaries, I can see why they're there. This person wanted to be a white knight and swoop in to "save" his patients. He set me up with a job working for one of his other clients. It was a disaster. The guy I worked for told me, after only 6 months, that I was the cause of everything that was wrong with his company, and then fired me. All because the therapist should not have linked up two of his clients. It must be difficult if you have to consider your entire community as off-limits. Isn't it possible to form a friendship outside of the counseling, and then make sure that if the person requires counseling, they go elsewhere to avoid the ethical conflict? <abbr><em><abbr><em>Dots last blog post..<a href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/deeperissues/eVcQ/~3/n1hUDvAUIn4/" rel="nofollow">April Showers and May Flowers</a></em></abbr></abbr></em> I’m not one to give advice on making friends. I’m too much of a loner and, with my disabilities, it’s hard to get out and meet people.

My therapist teaches ethics for psychotherapists, so I’ve heard a great deal about why they’re so important. However, since she’s involved with other therapists in teaching at a major university, as well as serving on committees in the APA and being elected to numerous offices, she’s not lonely. Objective supervision is essential and required, at least for psychotherapists in my state.

Having had a therapist who violated quite a few of the boundaries, I can see why they’re there. This person wanted to be a white knight and swoop in to “save” his patients. He set me up with a job working for one of his other clients. It was a disaster. The guy I worked for told me, after only 6 months, that I was the cause of everything that was wrong with his company, and then fired me. All because the therapist should not have linked up two of his clients.

It must be difficult if you have to consider your entire community as off-limits. Isn’t it possible to form a friendship outside of the counseling, and then make sure that if the person requires counseling, they go elsewhere to avoid the ethical conflict?

Dots last blog post..April Showers and May Flowers

]]> By: Barbara Swafford http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4392 Barbara Swafford Fri, 08 May 2009 07:29:28 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4392 Hi Patricia, As an introvert, I find I'm often a lone ranger, but I do let others in. It's always good to get amongst our peers, share stories and laughs, and those good 'ole day stories. Re: your blog. I love it just the way it is. Your writing is a joy to read as you always speak from the heart. As for collaborating, maybe guest posters? Hi Patricia,

As an introvert, I find I’m often a lone ranger, but I do let others in. It’s always good to get amongst our peers, share stories and laughs, and those good ‘ole day stories.

Re: your blog. I love it just the way it is. Your writing is a joy to read as you always speak from the heart.

As for collaborating, maybe guest posters?

]]> By: Patricia http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4383 Patricia Fri, 08 May 2009 03:03:58 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4383 Liara, "When you choose to be yourself, that is all that matters." Yes I think this is most true. The gathering was good and a nice event, but they could not help me with what I want to do...it was all the retired folks and only a few of the active folks and it was nice but not helpful. That just opened the door to me just working on the issue myself. Nice to be with other people just for the fun of it! Liara,
“When you choose to be yourself, that is all that matters.” Yes I think this is most true.
The gathering was good and a nice event, but they could not help me with what I want to do…it was all the retired folks and only a few of the active folks and it was nice but not helpful. That just opened the door to me just working on the issue myself.

Nice to be with other people just for the fun of it!

]]> By: Liara Covert http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4378 Liara Covert Fri, 08 May 2009 01:44:40 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4378 Boundaries are an issue that captures attention especially when a lesson is pending. This is like a friendly nudge to be alert. I am familiar with a group of retired clergy who get together periodically to reconnect. Alhough their interests evolve, the comaraderie remains. It is not what people do that keeps them together, but a timless sense of connectedness they are slowly learning to acknowledge, appreciate and decipher. When you choose to be yourself, that is all that matters. <abbr><em><abbr><em>Liara Coverts last blog post..<a href="http://blog.dreambuilders.com.au/journal/2009/5/7/10-reminders-the-intuition-age-is-now.html" rel="nofollow">10 Reminders the Intuition Age is Now</a></em></abbr></abbr></em> Boundaries are an issue that captures attention especially when a lesson is pending. This is like a friendly nudge to be alert.

I am familiar with a group of retired clergy who get together periodically to reconnect. Alhough their interests evolve, the comaraderie remains. It is not what people do that keeps them together, but a timless sense of connectedness they are slowly learning to acknowledge, appreciate and decipher.

When you choose to be yourself, that is all that matters.

Liara Coverts last blog post..10 Reminders the Intuition Age is Now

]]> By: Patricia http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4362 Patricia Thu, 07 May 2009 15:01:07 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4362 Sara, Thank you for your good comments. The gathering was a good time with colleagues but not enough discussion or substance on this idea. I really like the independence my blog gives me and that I can write on my own as most of my writing is so monitored...and having good editors can really make a book fabulous...I am still debating these ideas Sara,
Thank you for your good comments. The gathering was a good time with colleagues but not enough discussion or substance on this idea.

I really like the independence my blog gives me and that I can write on my own as most of my writing is so monitored…and having good editors can really make a book fabulous…I am still debating these ideas

]]> By: Sara http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4354 Sara Thu, 07 May 2009 09:49:56 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4354 Patricia, I can see how what you do requires monitoring boundaries. I imagine the upcoming conference is a chance to really relax with people who have the same concerns. I hope it will go very well for you. Regarding the blog board of directors, I'm not sure what you mean by this. I love what you write because it comes from you and is in your unique voice:~) <abbr><em><abbr><em>Saras last blog post..<a href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/sarahealy/soulconnections/~3/OnJLMm34BHc/" rel="nofollow">It’s okay to ask for help!</a></em></abbr></abbr></em> Patricia,

I can see how what you do requires monitoring boundaries. I imagine the upcoming conference is a chance to really relax with people who have the same concerns. I hope it will go very well for you.

Regarding the blog board of directors, I’m not sure what you mean by this. I love what you write because it comes from you and is in your unique voice:~)

Saras last blog post..It’s okay to ask for help!

]]> By: patricia http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4329 patricia Wed, 06 May 2009 16:35:11 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4329 Mark, I do find myself having reservations, partly because I have been following others directions for most of my life and I am rather liking this lone ranger position of blogging. When you change the idea to a "brain trust" that gets more interesting. Good ideas to ponder, I thank you. J.D. Wow another good idea to contemplate. Thank you. WOW I am truly mulling these ideas over... Mark,
I do find myself having reservations, partly because I have been following others directions for most of my life and I am rather liking this lone ranger position of blogging. When you change the idea to a “brain trust” that gets more interesting. Good ideas to ponder, I thank you.

J.D.
Wow another good idea to contemplate. Thank you. WOW I am truly mulling these ideas over…

]]> By: J.D. Meier http://patriciaswisdom.com/2009/05/relationships-and-the-role-of-boundaries/comment-page-1/#comment-4325 J.D. Meier Wed, 06 May 2009 15:52:50 +0000 http://patriciaswisdom.com/?p=312#comment-4325 I'm a fan of lone + team. I would keep your blog just you, that's why your readers are here, but I might start a team blog or have a page that shares the collective. <abbr><em><abbr><em>J.D. Meiers last blog post..<a href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/SourcesOfInsight/~3/HdAN5VLqz14/" rel="nofollow">Life Experiences and Leadership</a></em></abbr></abbr></em> I’m a fan of lone + team.

I would keep your blog just you, that’s why your readers are here, but I might start a team blog or have a page that shares the collective.

J.D. Meiers last blog post..Life Experiences and Leadership

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